So a spammer, a lawyer and a priest walk into...

February 1, 2002

I'm not entirely sure why, but this is one of the funnier spams I've seen recently.

FROM: makingabreakforit842211@yahoo.com
DATE: 2/1/2002 9:23 AM
SUBJECT: We Will ORDAIN You Within 24 Hours So You Can Serve

STREET BISHOPS, a U.S. based international ministry, has the authority to ORDAIN you immediately.

STREET BISHOPS believes that ordination should be given to all who ask. One of the benefits of being a LEGAL member of the clergy is that you will be authorized to perform the rites and ceremonies of the church. They include:

WEDDINGS - You can earn part-time income officiating marriages on weekends. Couples are searching for a wedding officiates. Most states require that you register your certificate (THAT WE SEND YOU) prior to conducting the ceremony. Some pastors work full-time as a wedding officiate, so can you! And we'll put you in our database of officates which receives thousands of requests for ordained ministers!

FUNERALS - The simple fact is that people die every day, providing a never-ending need for funeral officiates.

BAPTISMS - What a special way to welcome a child of God. As millions return to church and desire these official ceremonies, you are there to assist them! This adds to your part or full time income as a minister!

PRISON MINISTRIES - Since you will be a Certified Minister, you can visit others in need. Assist those who are ready to CHANGE their lives - You can play a major part in that decision!

HOSPITOL MINISTRIES - A an ordained clergy, you can be listed with most hospitals and conduct a successful hospital ministry.

WANT TO START YOUR OWN CHURCH? After your ordination, you may start your own congregation! We can offer much assistance as you begin your new place of worship.

YOU RECEIVE a professionally printed 8-inch by 10-inch color certificate and Letter of Ordination/Proof of Minister Certification in your name. We pay the U.S. shipping. For Shipping OUTSIDE the U.S. please add $15.00.

THE STREET BISHOP gaol is to make this life changing step easy and affordable so average folks like you can benefit from the advantages of being ordained, and you can be enabled to serve others. The administrative costs for processing the ordination is only $29.00.

FAX: To place your order by fax, complete the following form and fax to 1-413-487-7457, or use postal mail. We will not charge your credit card or deposit your check or money order until the documents are in the mail.

MAIL: For Cash, Check, or Money Order, complete the form below, make your check payable to "Street Bishops" and mail to

Ordination Committee
3206 South Hopkins Ave, #89
Titusville, Florida 32780 U.S.A.

ALL APPLICATIONS PROCESSED WITHIN 3 DAYS OF RECEIVING THEM

(Please print very clearly in dark ink)

Posted by Andrew Raff at February 1, 2002 10:57 AM